loving you

my sister once told me she had a professor who was absolutely crazy, but she loved her. the woman once told her

my education is my man. it puts a roof over my head, food on my table and
clothes on my back. i don't have to worry about it ever leaving me.

later that same week a stole her cosmo and was reading about Lady Gaga. She was talking about relationships too

some women choose to follow men, and women women choose to follow their dreams. If you're wondering which way to go, remember that your career will never wake up and tell you it doesn't love you anymore" (Cosmo April 2010)

I've followed men a lot in my life. i thought that that was the right thing to do . . . i planned my life around their plans and it hasn't gotten me anywhere but right where i was before.

the only constant through out it all was my education and i decided to take some time off of that to try to save a relationship that wasn't worth saving.

i'm ready to get my man back

my education back

the one thing i won't have to worry will ever leave me.


- i - wrote - this - yesterday - how - apropos - that - it - fits - today

i’ve grown more comfortable in my skin these days. since i shook you off of it.
the irony that it took letting go of my security blanket to actually find
security.
i’ve realized that it doesn’t take much to entrance men.
actually
it takes absolutely nothing.
the less you say. the less you do. the more they chase. after you.

i wish i'd known that when i was chasing after you so much.

i guess my life is just ironic in general

and with you. you liked me more when I liked you less.
and with you. you loved when she loved you and when i loved you, you left.
typical.
but i’ve learned…that loving is the careful act of realizing that all love dies
its fun while it lasts
its painful when it ends
and i’m not ready for that pain again
because i love quickly
and i die slow
and i’m
just
too
ready
to live today