I'm creating a list of rules and regulations for delivery...my mother thinks I'm being controlling...which is partly true...but also for the simple fact that once delivery is literally within seeing distance you slowly, but surely lose your mind.
Every time i turn around I hear about another random relative being invited for EDD and its driving me nuts. 1) because no one asked me how i felt about it and 2) because everyone is only thinking of themselves.
For once....i'm being completely selfish and considering my own feelings after i give birth.
so this is what i have so far:
I would like to set up some ground rules…because i think its only fair as I’m the one who’s giving birth to the baby and I’m starting to feel like everything ifs being taken out of my hands without asking me.
1) The day I go into labor – we’ll let everyone know, but please don’t come to the
hospital - wait until we call and say we are ready for visitors
This rule is to prevent unneeded stress to both the laboring woman (holly) and the laboring attendants (mom and Aaron). We will let Aaron’s mother know and my sister as soon as the baby is born and let them know when they can come to the hospital once I’ve been moved to the mommy and me floor
2) Please on the day that the baby is born i would like to limit visitors to just immediate family, (ie mom, dad, sister, brother. Please no extended family)
I understand that everyone is very excited to meet the baby, but I expect to be very tired after giving birth and would like time to rest. I would also like to have time with just my baby and my husband to bond as well as to establish breastfeeding. These are moments that can’t be taken back and I would really appreciate if everyone respected the need to calm and solace.
3) The day after delivery can we please limit visitors to the following times
4) When visiting – please no more than 4 people plus parents in the room.
5) Upon release from the hospital – please respect the same visiting hours and number of people at a time.
6) No pictures on facebook. I don’t want my daughter flashed across the Internet and when she is i want it to be done by either her father or mother.
7) Please respect the parents’ wishes. We understand that the advice given is from seasoned parents, but as this is our first child, we have our own ideas and plans on how to raise her. We will ask when we need help and advice, but extreme amount of advice can be overwhelming and will most likely be ignored.
do i think any of these will go over smoothly? OF COURSE NOT
do i expect a lot of family discussion about it? DEFINITELY
will i continue to do this for the rest of my life? IF I THINK ITS NECESSARY
we are coming from 2 completely different cultures. 1 that thinks as a unit and one that thinks as individuals.
I only need one person to depend on and i need that to be my husband....so i need him...for ONCE....to see things from my point of view. just once to back me on what i think is important and just ONCE(!!!!) stand up to his mother and tell her to sit the fuck down.
i'm not going to stress too much about this...but trust and believe that I will be telling the hospital staff the same things...so if aaron can't grow some...i know they will